Therapist Blog

In honor of Women’s History Month and Emily Dickinson, a magnificent poet, let’s consider all the possibilities of what it means to be human and humane...for all who have been oppressed...

March 2019

Psychotherapy New York

In honor of Women’s History Month, I give you... Malala Yousafzai. I celebrate her as a crusader for the education of girls and women. The root of the word “eduction” means to bring forth. Can you imagine what it would be like if girls and women were fully brought forth in the world to be all of themselves?

Februrary  2019

Letting go of some habit, attachment, behavior pattern does not come easy to me.

There’s an expression in the recovery movement: “Everything I let go of has claw marks on it.”

 relate so much to that. I have found that letting go actually has two meanings;

it’s about surrendering to something I can’t change and finding peace with that.

And it’s also about taking an action on something I can change... like letting go of sugar or victim thinking. 

Letting go is ultimately about healthy power... and it is completely different from giving up.

What’s the difference between letting go and giving up for you?

Special "Happy Fall" Occasional Dr. Duffy Dose

 

 October 2018

We live in an age of uncertainty... and it will become increasingly so.

It may seem counter-intuitive, but we can learn to thrive in uncertainty.

Abraham Maslow wrote about the nature of Self-actualization.... people living up to their

highest potential and moving beyond themselves for the good of their fellow humans. 

It involves eschewing tribal fears and not needing to conform for approval. 

If we are intentional in taking such a stance, we learn to live our life from the inside out....

staying in alignment with our consciously chosen values. In so doing we build a solid self foundation of inner resources, 

resilience and the ability to reach out to others in Community. I wish you a grounded center to grow from in these chaotic times. 💞💞💓 The Occasional Dr. Duffy Dose

Septemeber 2018

Yes! As a matter of fact, this is the difference between healthy and unhealthy guilt.

There is such a thing as healthy guilt; it’s when you go against your own freely chosen

values, feel remorse, make amends and resolve not to repeat your error.

Unhealthy guilt is when you go against introjected values, what others have told you to value.

And it’s also when you are excessively harsh with yourself..and label yourself...

or take in the label from others that you are a horrible human being. You choose!

 The Occasional Dr. Duffy Dose

Summer | July 25, 2018

I find this to be true..... and a fascinating question. The answer lies in vulnerability.

What happens if I express love and am rebuffed? What then? What do I make of that? Unfortunately, in a world that breeds low self-esteem, we can make it about ourselves...

that we are somehow unlovable. This is a very common introjection .. for various reasons. What if we just dropped that belief or put it aside...and simply allowed ourselves

to feel the love already in our hearts....and expressed it to living beings... including pets and plants?

What if? IMAGINE.

Wishing you a Happy Love Day...everyday.

Dr. Duffy ❤️🌸🌺

February 2018

I’m sharing this piece of art by Emily Blatt because it is beautiful and exemplifies my focus for the New Year. Yes, gratitude for what we already have expands our hearts and gives us energy for transformation. There are lots of mixed feelings about writing New Year’s Resolutions. I am revisiting this custom by examining the root of the word. Human beings have problems that they endeavor to solve.

Since we are all so far from perfect, we can continue to re-solve them with an attitude

of accepting our imperfections as well as our good intentions. When I look at re-solution in this way, I am much more willing and open to it.For 2018, my resolution is different: rather than thinking of specific things I want to do differently, I am focusing on the kind of person I want to be. I want to be a person who makes room for Joy in my life... especially for the little things. I also want to make room for Stillness ... which brings connection to self...and All There Is. I also want to be a person who resists acrimony and ignorance with Loving kindness. And so be it.

Wishing you a warm welcome into the New Year... 

Dr.Duffy Spencer

January 2018

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"If you hear the dogs, keep going. If you see the torches in the woods, keep going. If there's shouting after you, keep going. Don't ever stop. Keep going. If you want a taste of freedom, keep going" - Harriet Tubman

 

In honor of Black History Month, I offer up this heart wrenching quote from my hero Harriet Tubman. I admire her beyond words.

In honor of Black History Month 2019

Thank you, Louise, for all you have given us.

December 2017

I love kindness; it’s my most important attribute in a person. The word “kind” is one of the oldest words in the English language...dating back before 900. Its original meaning was nature ...as in ...it’s in our nature to be kind. It’s who we really are...a source of our groundedness...especially in the face of unkindness. I believe in Unconditional Constructiveness...ie...how a person behaves towards us doesn’t give us license to behave badly ourselves. If you fight fire with fire, all you get is ashes. - Abigail Van Buren

November  2017

Whether it’s real storms...or the storms of life, so true.When it’s stormy in the world, we can go within and find that calm center.It’s always there...if we look for it. - Dr. Duffy

October 2017

We are all so perfectly imperfect. What do you imagine it would be like if you truly accepted your imperfectness? If you even embraced and delighted in your quirkiness and uniqueness?? - Dr. Duffy 

October  2017

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